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Cool, Calm & Connected ezine
Be seen, heard and remembered
…every time you speak.
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July / August 2009
A “How To” ezine of practical strategies and inspiration to help professionals communicate with ease and authenticity every time they speak. Average read: 3 minutes.
Published by Geraldine Barkworth every 2 months & emailed to confidential subscriber lists.
Back issues: are available here
What’s New
 Communicate Connect Levels 1, 2 & 3, Brunswick Heads, Aug 12–Oct 28, 2009.
Authentic voice public speaking in just 12 weeks, small group of 8 people only.
Program Information
Cool, Calm & Connected 5 day retreat, Sunshine Coast QLD, Oct 31-Nov 4, 2009.
Come and join me at this Women Only event - press the “Pause Button” and let your “Inner Speaker” out to play at this exclusive working holiday. In 5 days you will become a public speaker who communicates with ease, grace and an authenticity that is compellingly attractive. Be prepared to emerge radiant from your chrysalis, not shrinking, but seeking, public speaking opportunities. A whole new world is about to open up for you. Contact Geraldine for information and registration now.
Program Information
“Managing Boardroom Bullies”
Article 4 of 6 in the 2009 theme of “How To Talk In Difficult Places”.
“With each issue, learn how to stay comfortable within your own skin to make meaningful connections and get your point across, even in the most trying of public places…”
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The Problem
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Intimidation – The Way Of The Bully – can happen whenever one person decides to take more than their share of power, resources, time or attention. If you don’t know how to stand your ground and make yourself heard in the boardroom, one of the most intimidating of public places to speak, you will quickly become it’s casualty.
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The Impact
On You
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It’s hard to stand your ground when you feel intimidated. In fact it may feel easier to wish that ground would open and swallow you whole. When intimidated, my clients have reported the following feelings:
• A sense of being made small or reduced in value;
• Wondering if they are wearing a Cloak Of Invisibility;
• Anger and in danger of saying something they’ll later regret;
• A drop in esteem and creeping self doubt.
Feeing intimidated can happen to the most confident of people. Learning to be less influenced by the behaviours of people around you, allows you to stand your
ground with ease.
Boardrooms and meetings offer you an opportunity to develop intestinal fortitude and emotional intelligence. And neither appears on the Meeting Agenda. There’s a lot you can learn beneath the surface – about yourself and others.
Decide which experiences you intend to enjoy at your next meeting:
• You are always greeted and acknowledged at the start and finish.
• You feel included in the groups’ eye contact, body language and conversation.
• When it’s your turn to speak, you feel heard.
• You are treated with respect and rarely interrupted or reduced.
• The group is prepared to action or discuss your proposal.
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The Solution
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Here’s how you can stand your ground and make an impact in the boardroom:
1. Prepare and think through your proposal. Be clear about your purpose, outcomes and benefits. Anticipate possible objections and create counter arguments or alternatives. If you have considerable material, email to the other members in advance. Develop a good relationship with the chairperson, or even better, be the chairperson!
2. Dress well. If you look good, you’ll feel good. Do not wear revealing clothing. Humans make judgements of each other within 9 seconds.
3. Walk into the room with your head high and without hesitation, initiate gentle eye contact and acknowledge others politely. Take a seat beside those you feel an affinity or who are positively influential.
4. Claim your space at the table. Don’t allow yourself to be elbowed out by other’s paraphernalia or presence. Take slow, deep breaths, ground yourself though the floor, relax your hands and avoid fidgeting.
5. When it’s your turn to speak, pause, take a breath, make soft eye contact with one another person and succinctly outline your subject, purpose and it’s relevance in less than 2 minutes. Engage their interest by explaining what’s in it for them, outlining an outcome or benefit. Be clear about what is needed from them to make it happen. If people don’t know what to do they are more likely to say “no” without even thinking about it.
6. At the end of the meeting, arrange to connect with your allies to continue the conversation or project with the aim of building relationships. Always follow through with what you say you will do. The next time you enter the boardroom, you will have gained at least one new relationship and you’ll automatically feel more confident.
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What You Can Do
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Many of my clients visualise a powerful, immovable object which cannot be belittled or ignored, like a huge tree with spreading roots and limbs or a venerable mountain or a deep, calm lake. When they summon up the qualities inside themselves of that powerful, timeless, immovable tree, mountain or lake, they cannot be intimidated.
Try creating a simple visualisation for yourself before your next meeting and you too may very well become a force of nature, in the boardroom.
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© 2009, Geraldine Barkworth. Reprintable when full credit is given and the whole newsletter is reproduced.
For more information about services including private coaching, corporate training or to make a media enquiry, please contact Geraldine Barkworth directly on +61 (2) 6685 1917 or email geraldine@coolcalmconnect.com.au
To subscribe or unsubscribe, please email office@coolcalmconnect.com.au with your request.
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